Your last night of single hood – and who better to celebrate it with than a group of your closest friends! That’s the idea of the bachelorette party, which goes back to eons ago when it was traditional for the bride to host a bridesmaids’ tea – a ladies-only, very prim and proper event. My, how times have changed!
No matter how you look at it, the bachelorette party is an opportunity for brides-to-be and their closest buddies to spend a night on the town, a weekend at a spa or an evening at a fancy restaurant. It’s a casual way to de-stress after six months of planning – stepping back from the formal wedding etiquette that tends to permeate most weddings and just hang out.
Whether you want to splurge for that intimate dinner with friends, party like a rock star on a rented bus in Las Vegas or just hang out at home playing Scrabble, the sky’s the limit. It all depends on the bride’s preferences.
Don’t Stress Out the Bride!
Hey! All you party planners/close friends and family: This is the first rule of thumb for a successful bachelorette party event. Do not stress out the bride. She should not be planning her party – only enjoying the ride. Definitely ask for her input (she might not be too thrilled with the idea of wearing an unmentionable around her neck…), and keep her preferences in mind.
Some brides just might not be as interested in a lot of the gimmicky things that can be a part of bachelorette parties – like getting her to do a list of 10 crazy things that night, or pressuring her do shots at a local bar.
All she really wants is to hang out with her friends, talk about pre-wedding jitters and let off some steam about how her mother is taking over the wedding. Of course, if she wants to party like it’s 1999 – by all means, let her!
Experts advise picking activities that match the bride’s style – always keeping in mind the personalities and preferences of the guests who might be there (her mother or the groom’s mother, for example). The point is to keep her feelings and preferences in mind – and good friends should be sure they know what those are.
One important point: timing. Best friends, sisters, mothers of the bride, this is for you. Avoid having the last hurrah event the day before the ceremony. Get out your calendars and plan the bachelorette party at least two weeks before the ceremony – maybe even the same night as her groom-to-be’s bachelor party.
It might seem like a moot point, but the last thing your best friend/sister/daughter wants is to feel and look her worst on what’s supposed to be one of the most romantic, exciting days of her life. Make it a fun evening – but schedule it for well in advance of the wedding.
Have Fun, But Be Safe
No matter how much you plan, there’s always going to be someone who gets a little too tipsy, so plan for it. Whether or not your bachelorette party plans include drinking with the girls, it’s a good idea to appoint a designated driver or, better yet, hire a limousine service for the night. A limo will add a classy touch to the event – and will ensure the party ends at a reasonable hour and gets everyone home safely.
For those who don’t drink, there are plenty of nightclubs and other places that can accommodate non-alcoholic events. Bowling in a veil anyone? Or how about ice-skating and hot chocolate at a local rink? Both are fun, active alternatives – and you can even invite older children who may be in town for the wedding to make it a truly inclusive affair.
What to Do?
Bachelorette parties might have been viewed as the female version of the movie “Bachelor Party” with Tom Hanks, but lucky for us, times have changed.
Instead of ogling a Chippendale’s dancer, you’re more likely to be invited to a day of pampering at a local spa, or a weekend getaway to a spa paradise like Las Vegas. Why? It’s girlie, it’s fun – and it’s a heck of a lot more satisfying than giving dollar bills to a male stripper at a smoky bar. It also gives brides a great opportunity to have some real one-on-one time with close family and friends.
Combining the bachelor and bachelorette parties is another popular idea. Consider guys versus girl’s games, a couples’ shower/party or a nice evening out for a great dinner with friends.
Some brides-to-be take a cue from elementary and junior high days and plan an old-fashioned pajama party. It’s probably the last time brides-to-be and close friends/sisters will be able to do so, so why not make it the last hurrah? Include a game of truth-or-dare, and grab some toilet paper to “wrap” her groom-to-be’s house. You’re guaranteed to have a blast!
Whatever you choose, make it fun and memorable, and take plenty of pictures – and make at least one of them a fun group shot of close friends and family that you’ll treasure forever when you remember that night.