Gift-Giving 101
Lorna Rothanzl
Bridal registries can be a mixed bag of reactions for today’s couples. It’s fun to browse shops, specialty stores and major department stores for china, flatware and mulching mowers. But you may have just a twinge of guilt once you check out the inventory on your wish list.
Retail experts across the country respond with a hearty “don’t!” Registries are actually a relief for wedding guests who want to give just the right gift. And you’ll receive just what you wanted.
Most guests seek out gift registries. They want to look at an entire registry and then select something from that list that they like as well. That way they’re giving something they’ve personally chosen, and know it’s what the couple really wants. Registries can also reduce the risk of duplicate gifts and the ensuing returns.
Sharing your registry information without breaking etiquette rules can be tricky. Though there’s really no tactful way to tell people where to buy gifts, many couples develop personal websites to outline wedding schedules, provide site directions and highlight their gift registries.
Timing is an important element in the registry process. Invitations typically are sent six weeks before a wedding, so many guests begin shopping a week or so later. It’s a good idea to complete the registry process right before the invitations are sent, so the list is in place and the selected items are available.
It’s possible to register too far in advance. Your guests may wait until just before the wedding to purchase gifts. The items you select six months before your wedding could be seasonal or one-of-a-kind and may be sold out before they’ve begun shopping. In those cases, it might be wise to add items to the registry as the wedding date nears.
The items on registries can be as unique as the couples themselves. Entertaining items are an increasingly popular addition to registries. Today’s couples are entertaining together, and they’re entertaining in ways that suit their lifestyles without expectations of formality. They want interesting and fresh touches for entertaining and they’re registering for items that reflect that, such as hand-blown martini glasses, unique table linens, special barware and accessories for the home and table.
Aside from the informal, a gift registry will provide you with gifts that can become part of your daily life and often, cherished family heirlooms.
From a can opener to a major appliance such as a refrigerator or washer/dryer set, the price ranges covered in your gift registry should be as wide-spread as your guest list. Most experts emphasize that couples can’t register too broadly or too much. But a broad range of items and prices doesn’t mean you want to register for every item in a store. This will only defeat the registry purpose and confuse your guests even more.
Of course there are always gift registry alternatives.
A growing trend in registries finds couples going on-line to register for honeymoons or home mortgages, and ask their guests to share in those costs. Other options are investments such as stocks or bonds.
If you choose to go the conventional route and register at an area department or specialty store, it’s best to complete a gift registry during a weekday. A sales representative can offer you undivided attention and stores are less likely to be filled with weekend shoppers.
Always ask for a list of your registry items to take with you and ponder during a quiet moment at home. Things you thought you just had to have during the heat of the registry moment may loose their luster in hindsight.
The bottom line is bridal registries provide a win-win situation for you and your guests. You’ll receive just what you want, and your guests will be assured their gifts will be whole-heartedly accepted and appreciated for years to come