Weddings of the rich and famous
Sheila Anne Feeney
Admit it – you’d love to have the budget for the kind of fantasy, over-the-top extravagant affair you see in celebrity gossip magazines. However, unless you recently won the lottery, you’ll have to settle for the stories from wedding consultants to the rich and famous. With this in mind, we went behind the scenes to get the inside scoop and here’s what we found: GUESTS GALORE A bride who worked on Wall Street “asked us to hire fake guests to go around complimenting real guests, so people would feel comfortable and loved at her wedding,” recalls Angela Nevarez, senior account executive for The Creative Edge, a tony event-planning firm. More common, says Nevarez, is hiring professional dancers for the reception. Just like you, brides of means also want to make sure their guests dance at their affairs. They figure that men are more likely to hit the floor when beautiful women are on hand to make them feel like Fred Astaire; and women are more likely to shake a tail feather when asked to waltz by a Fred Astaire. ALL DOLLED UP One southern bride had an exact replica made of her wedding gown – a gown that cost over $13,000. The replica ran about $6500. The purpose? So she could change into it for the reception. “It was a giant extravagance, but she wanted to look fresh for photographs,” confides Nevarez. Sometimes the gown is just one of the indulgently expensive outfits that brides order for the affair, reports Michael Gapinski, director of corporate and event management for Along Came Mary, the Los Angeles party planners that coordinated the wedding of Brad Pitt and Jennifer Aniston. Fantasy weddings, Gapinski notes, often involve at least three gown changes by the bride throughout the event, with a team of stylists to look after hair and change jewelry and other accessories. FOOD, GLORIOUS FOOD There may be multiple caviar stations, where $224-an-ounce Iranian beluga is shoveled out like snow from a driveway. Fois gras is another popular offering, as is imported lobster from the Caribbean, jumbo shrimp, and artistically designed sushi created by chefs on site. Dietary preferences of guests are taken into account and lots of exquisitely perfect appetizer and entrée options offered for vegetarians, dieters, and people who watch what they eat for religious or medical reasons. As Gapinski explains, a generous budget allows the bride and groom to plan an affair that makes “every person feel so comfortable they want to be the last to leave.” DETAILS, DAHLING, DETAILS The real difference between a meticulously budgeted and spare-no-expense affair is in the details: unlimited funds allow a bride’s hired hands to stimulate all human senses. The ceiling is redone in antique Chinese silk. A specially designed dance floor is ordered in for the ballroom. Orchid-entwined bridges are built over swimming pools. Giant trees are transplanted to indoor venues. Tents are comfortably air-conditioned. A fireworks display entertains during dessert. Lighting geniuses select the perfect wattage to give an exquisite glow to the bride. THE POWER OF FLOWERS Flower quality is one tell-tale element that distinguishes high-end weddings: “You have a $7 peony instead of a $3.50 peony,” in every arrangement, says Susan Holland, an event planner who throws parties for socialites such as Denise Rich. The tasteful rich, she says, “spend a lot of money so it doesn’t show – it’s a finely defined aesthetic of the client not for show or status, but to revel in aesthetic pleasure.” And no — the guests do not take the centerpieces home with them, laughs Meredith Waga Perez, co-owner of Belle Fleur. Perhaps because the frothy, four-feet tall, $600 centerpieces of dendrobium orchids in the clear trumpet vases are unwieldy to carry. Or perhaps such guests have their own florists on retainer. Flower budgets often go into the hundreds of thousands of dollars, with garlands swagging every banister and replacing red velvet ropes. Bridal bouquets – which can run to $1,000 – may be swathed in antique lace and Swarovski crystals. Lenny Zilz, the vice-president of business development for John Daly, Inc. International, says the absolutely highest quality must be inherent in every element from the divinely fragrant garden roses to the silver (usually Reed and Barton) to the table linens. “There is never anything synthetic on the table!” according to Zilz, whose Santa Barbara event company coordinated weddings for Frank Sinatra, Paula Abdul, Raquel Welch and Bette Midler. Flowers are flown in from individual locations all over the world, to guarantee that each bloom is the best that can be found, Zilz explains. Barbra Streisand’s 1998 wedding to James Brolin was a botanical orgy of gardenias, stephanotis vines, smilax, variegated ivy, and roses in luscious shades from burgundy to pink. “One wedding in Kentucky had a $125,000 floral budget,” reminisces Gerard J. Monaghan, president of the Association of Bridal Consultants in New Milford, Connecticut. He adds, “the grandmother paid a quarter million dollars to the diocese of Louisville to have the cathedral sandblasted so it would look good in the pictures.” THE EXTRAS When you’re a celebrity, plan to spend untold amounts on security to keep out crashers, stalkers and uninvited media. As many as 300 security people will be on the job, many just to keep out unwanted photographers and spies from tabloids and television. Other than the one official “just married” snap released voluntarily to the press, “there were NO pictures of Jennifer and Brad’s wedding,” boasts Gapinski. A black van was parked outside the gates of Streisand’s Malibu estate that blared White Zombie’s “Thunder Kiss ‘65” for the paparazzi trying to sneak an unauthorized peek at the proceedings. Meanwhile, inside Marvin Hamlish conducted an orchestra. Celebrities also spring for the out-of-town guests lodging. Rather than toss them an area map and fruit basket, a celeb will leave a wonderful parting gift. At one wedding, “the men got cufflinks and the women got eternity necklaces – both from Tiffany’s,” notes Claudia Hanlin, proprietor of Claudia Hanlin’s Wedding Library, which maintains an archive of vendors and wedding planners for brides. “Two days before one wedding, we sent out 175, $100-gift bouquets to guests with notes saying, ‘Looking forward to seeing you Saturday night,’” recalls Waga Perez. “It’s all about ‘O.T.T.,’ - being Over the Top.” THE PLEASURE IS MINE - REALLY! Wealthy brides don’t necessarily expect a reciprocal show of appreciation from those lucky enough to attend the once-in-a-lifetime party. “Celebrities in particular, often request that the guests bring no gift at all,” says Hanlin, Sometimes the couple will suggest that guests give money to charity. More often they later announce that guests’ money has been given to charity as a sort of mitzvah in exchange for their good fortune. WORDS OF WISDOM While it’s natural to wish you could lavish a fortune on your wedding, it’s never wise to spend more on it than you can truly afford. Take comfort in the old saying – that the length of the marriage is often in inverse proportion to the amount of money spent on the wedding. While this is no absolute rule, the tabloids are filled with stories of over-the-top nuptials that lasted about as long as the marriage itself. “My advice,” says Hanlin, “is have a wedding where you don’t feel stressed about how much you’re spending. If you are, you’re spending too much.”