Your Wedding Spending Plan
Margie Morin
As a bride-to-be, you have a million things zipping through your mind. Open bar or cocktail hour? Small and intimate guest list or invite everyone we know? Hometown or destination wedding? Your perfect wedding is approaching and now you’ve got to pay for it. But there are just as many ways to pay for your wedding as there are to plan it – the trick is devising a spending plan that works best for you.
Traditionally, the bride’s family pays for the wedding, but times have changed. Today’s bride and groom are more likely to foot the bill, with little financial assistance from their families. When it comes to sharing wedding costs, speak with everyone from both families to work out the most reasonable solution for all involved.
“Be realistic about where the money will be coming from,” says Ellen Bronstein, a bridal counselor and founder of Stress-Free Bride NY. Consider how much money you expect to save during your engagement and find out how much your families will contribute. “Although money is an awkward subject to talk about in many families, it’s better to ask than assume,” says Bronstein. “You never want to count on money you think someone will be giving you and then be stuck in the end.”
“It’s not always easy to ask family for financial help,” says Preeti D. Shah, senior wedding consultant for Spotlight Style in N.Y. and N.J. But if you need to ask family members to chip in, Shah proposes approaching the topic by suggesting that your family contribute to the wedding as a gift to you and your fiancé.
If your family helps, include them in the planning because they will probably want input on how the money is spent. Keep them updated on your pricing research so they know you’re not simply going for the most outrageously priced items and vendors. Your mom may not understand why a wedding cake costs $750 and your dad may not see how a dress you’ll wear just for one day can cost $4,000, but showing them examples of average prices can help them understand.
You also need to get your priorities in gear. What are your wedding must-haves? Do you care about elaborate centerpieces? Do you want a large bridal party? Do you have to hold your wedding in the spring? Narrowing these details down will help you decide what’s okay to splurge on and where you can tone down.
No matter how modest or lavish the wedding, laying out a spending plan is a must for every couple. The elements of your wedding you’ll need to budget for include invitations, flowers, reception, photography/videography, music/entertainment, wedding dress, tuxedo rental, rings, limos, attendant gifts, and the honeymoon. How much you allocate for each category depends on what’s important to you and your fiancé. For example, if you really want a great band at your wedding you may want to spend more of your budget on that and cut from another area.
A good way to start structuring your budget is by having you and your fiancé each compile a list of priorities and desires for the wedding. Once your lists are complete, compare them and agree on what you both want. Put the categories in a priority order you are both comfortable with, and decide on an amount you want to spend on each. After you’ve met with the wedding professionals, write down the actual costs.
Keep track of all expenses to get a clear picture of how much your wedding will cost. You can do this by creating a checklist of each and every wedding item and service. For example, paying for your reception doesn’t only involve paying your venue’s per-head price. Additional reception costs may also include valet parking, linens, table centerpieces, gratuity, and meals for vendors.
One area that many brides splurge on is photography, which makes sense because it’s something you’ll have for years to come. Spending money on a quality photographer can also save you from falling victim to another low-cost photographer horror story, and is a perfect example of getting what you pay for. Your venue is always the biggest cost. If you can’t imagine having your wedding anywhere else than your number one choice, find out what their off-season prices are (a large number of weddings are held between May and October).
Any wedding consultant would be more than willing to help you and your groom set up a spending plan to ensure you get the most out of your wedding allowance. Just be sure to make choices based on what make you and your groom happy. n